What a Lovely Dinner Party!
by Marmalade Fever
Summary: When Grunnings develops dental drills, guess who Uncle Vernon has over for a business dinner? The Grangers of course!


What a Lovely Dinner Party  
  
By Marmalade Fever  
  
Disclaimer: I'm a very nice person who does not want you to get mad at me for writing a fanfic. Remember, imitation is the sincerest form of flattery and fanaticism is a close second. Harry Potter and insignia belong to J.K. Rowling, her editors, publishers, and all those countless others.  
  
Vernon Dursley worked at a company called Grunnings, which made high quality drills, distributed throughout the world. His boss, Mr. P. Grunning Jr., called him into his office one day.  
  
"You wanted to see me, sir?" asked Mr. Dursley.  
  
"Yes, Dursley," said Mr. P. Grunnings Jr. "I'm planning to develop a new line of drills!"  
  
"A new line of drills, sir? No wonder you're the man in charge! That's a brilliant idea! I only wish I could have thought of such a wonderful idea as that," Mr. Dursley said, laying it on thick.  
  
"Yes, well..." said Mr. P. Grunnings Jr. "This new line will be dental drills."  
  
"Excellent! Like I always say, dentistry is the way of the future. Why, just the other day, I was mentioning to my wife Petunia that her exquisite teeth could only have been the work of a fine dentist, a fine dentist indeed!"  
  
"...Anyway," said Mr. P. Grunnings Jr. "I would like to ask you to meet with a couple of potential clients. A business dinner, perhaps."  
  
"Why, Mr. P. Grunnings Jr.! That's a wonderful idea! If you could be promoted, I'd move that you should be, but since you can't, my work is done!"  
  
"Good. You can consult your wife about a date and I'll have my secretary set it up for you," said Mr. P. Grunnings Jr.  
  
"Thank you for giving me this great honor to represent you, Sir! I won't let you down. You can count on me."  
  
"Oh, and Dursley?" added Mr. P. Grunnings Jr.  
  
"Yes, sir?"  
  
"This couple especially enjoys children, so I'd make sure that that son and nephew of yours are there. They'll probably want to bring their daughter along."  
  
"Of course, sir. Thank you, sir."  
  
Later that evening  
  
"Well Petunia," Mr. Dursley said to his wife as she brought him a cup of coffee, "My boss, Mr. P. Grunnings Jr., has asked that we entertain a couple of potential clients."  
  
Mrs. Dursley looked stuck between happiness and anxiety. "That's wonderful Dear! Will they be coming here?"  
  
"Certainly. When would be a good time for you?" Mr. Dursley asked his wife.  
  
"How about next Tuesday night? Diddydums will be home by then."  
  
"Good, my boss recommended that we have the boys here, as the two of them enjoy children."  
  
"Boys?" asked Mrs. Dursley, going chalky white.  
  
"Yes, he recommended that they both be here."  
  
"Oh no!"  
  
"Oh yes! We'll have to give the boy a talking to. At least if he's with us, we'll be able to keep an eye on him."  
  
"But, but, but Vernon!"  
  
"Tuesday night it is, I'll inform Mr. P. Grunnings Jr.'s secretary at once."  
  
Tuesday morning  
  
"Now, boy," Mr. Dursley said, eying his nephew, "no funny business! You hear me? One peep out of you and it's the cupboard for the rest of the summer!"  
  
"Fine," said the boy, smoothing his hair, revealing a lightening shaped scar on his forehead.  
  
Tuesday afternoon  
  
"Is the pudding finished?" asked Mr. Dursley of his wife.  
  
"Just now," said Mrs. Dursley.  
  
"Are the steaks going to be ready on time?"  
  
"Of course."  
  
"How about the corn on the cob?"  
  
"The boy is working on that."  
  
"Are the mashed potatoes coming along?"  
  
"No lumps in sight."  
  
"Good."  
  
Tuesday, 5:30 pm  
  
"Is the table set?" Mr. Dursley asked his wife.  
  
"With the best china."  
  
"Did you have Dudley put the floss at each place setting?"  
  
"Of course."  
  
"Are the boys in their good clothes?"  
  
"Ties and all."  
  
"Good."  
  
Tuesday, 5:40  
  
"You boys should probably station yourselves in the living room," Mr. Dursley said to his son and nephew.  
  
"Okay," said the two boys.  
  
Tuesday, 5:43  
  
"IS THAT A WAND?" asked Mr. Dursley, not so calmly.  
  
"No, it's a pencil," said his nephew.  
  
Tuesday, 5:49  
  
"Dudley, your tie is askew!" said Mr. Dursley to his son.  
  
"Whoops," said the boy, and straightened it. Tuesday, 5:56  
  
"Everyone, get in position!" shouted Mr. Dursley to his family.  
  
Tuesday, 5:59  
  
"Here they come!" Mr. Dursley announced, wiping away a bit of sweat.  
  
Tuesday, 5:59 and 43 seconds  
  
"Welcome to our humble home! May I take your coats?" asked the Dursley's son, Dudley.  
  
"Why thank you," said a woman, who had just stepped through the door.  
  
Tuesday, 5:59 and 45 seconds  
  
"Mrs. Granger?" asked Mr. Dursley's nephew.  
  
"Hello dear," said Mrs. Granger.  
  
"Hello Harry," said Mrs. Granger's husband.  
  
"Hi Harry," said their daughter.  
  
"Aah!" said Mr. Dursley.  
  
Tuesday, 6:00  
  
"So, um, you know Harry from, um, where?" asked Mr. Dursley, before adding, "Um."  
  
"He goes to school with our little Hermione," said Mr. Granger.  
  
"That's right," said Mrs. Granger, "they're very good friends."  
  
"Would you, er, like to, er, sit down, er?" asked Mrs. Dursley.  
  
"Thank you," said the Grangers in unison.  
  
"Something smells delicious," said Mr. Granger. "What is it?"  
  
"Meat," said Mrs. Dursley.  
  
"Oh, what kind?" asked Mrs. Granger.  
  
"Steak," grunted Mr. Dursley. "What nice dental floss you've provided," said Mr. Granger.  
  
"Yeah, yeah, good floss," said Mr. Dursley.  
  
"So, Harry," said Mrs. Granger. "I heard you're quite a good little wizard. I wouldn't really know, though, since my husband and I aren't."  
  
"You aren't?" asked the Dursley's son, Dudley.  
  
"No, no, Hermione is the only witch in the family," said Mr. Granger.  
  
"Is that so?" asked Mr. Dursley, color coming to his face.  
  
"Want to sit next to me, Hermione?" asked the Dursley's nephew, Harry.  
  
"Great!" said the Granger's daughter, Hermione.  
  
"Ee!" said Dudley.  
  
Fifteen minutes later  
  
"Would anyone like some green beans?" asked Mrs. Dursley.  
  
"No, no, I'm very full," said Mr. Granger.  
  
"I would," said Mrs. Granger, "I positively adore green beans!"  
  
Four minutes after that  
  
"This is a very pleasant dinner," said Mr. Granger.  
  
"Yes, very pleasant," said Mrs. Dursley.  
  
"We should do this again some time," said Mr. Granger.  
  
"Yes, that would be delightful," said Mrs. Granger.  
  
"Maybe..." said Mr. Dursley.  
  
"Ee!" said Dudley.  
  
Ten minutes more  
  
"That's a very lovely pudding, Mrs. Dursley," said the Granger's daughter Hermione.  
  
Ten seconds later  
  
"Thank you," said Mrs. Dursley.  
  
One hour later "It's been a very nice evening," said Mr. Granger.  
  
"Yes, what a lovely dinner party," said Mrs. Granger.  
  
"Do you think Harry could come over some time?" asked Hermione.  
  
"Perhaps," said Mr. Dursley.  
  
"Goodnight," said Mrs. Dursley.  
  
"Goodnight," said Mrs. Granger.  
  
"Goodnight," said Mr. Dursley.  
  
"Goodnight," said Mr. Granger.  
  
"See you soon," said Hermione.  
  
"Send me an owl," said Harry.  
  
"Goodbye Dudley," said the Grangers.  
  
"Ee!" said Dudley.  
  
The End!  
  
A.N. Boy was that fun to write! Reviews always appreciated! 


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